Destiny
July 12, 2005
Hi, My name is Destiny and im only 17 years old, i seem to have alot of trouble accepting the fact that my lips are VERY big, they dangle down at least an inch, i NEVER let my boyfriends see them or reach down the touch my pussy because that meens that they would have to touch my lips. My current boyfriend tells me that he understands how i feel and not to be scared because he doesnt care. But i still seem to have a very large problem with having sex with him...im still a virgin and im scared that i will try to stay that way for a long time. i have no self confidence and personnaly sometimes i get so frustrated that i want to cut them off!! i dont find anything appealing about them..all guys think of me as omg shes hot and she has big tits..but they dont know what to expect when i get them under the covers...im writing this to you because im so unhappy and i dont want to live like this...this is how depressed i am about this..i cant even go swimming without thinking : omg can u see them hang down threw my bathing suit...or omg what happens if someone sees them..i jsut want people to accept me the way i am but what happens if they cant?
Dear Destiny,
At first sight you appear to suffer from the same lack of self-esteem as some of the other girls who have written me. The difference is that all the other writers said they felt better after viewing the site, many even to the point of becoming proud of their large sexy lips and feeling blessed. So I wonder, ...did you look at the photos? If so, have they changed your opinion at all?
Because if a site like this can't improve your self-esteem, then I don't know what it will take for you to get over it. I could sit here and write you paragraph upon paragraph of how sexy and beautiful big labia are but it won't help you much. Or I could tell you that there are others who are in a much more difficult situation than yours, like this Muslim woman who has no say in the choice of her future husband and who used to have terrible worries that he might dislike her dangling labia lips. But that won't do the trick either, ...knowing that there are people who are doing worse than us doesn't make our problems any less.
Your current boyfriend says he understands how you feel and that he doesn't care. But he hasn't seen your lips and has never had sex with you, and that makes you scared he may still get turned-off once he sees or touches them. So, what to do, what to do...
One thing is for sure, you need to start taking some steps to get through this. Emotionally you cannot stay the way you are now. You could try to get a reaction from people who are not so close to you, like your doctor. But the best thing to do is to take this issue head-on: get your boyfriend to see and touch your big beautiful lips. I'm convinced he will LOVE what he sees.
You mention that you are very depressed about this. Is it the only thing you're depressed about? I mean, could there be a more deep-seated reason that causes you to fear others not accepting you the way you are? If so then don't be afraid to get the help of a professional therapist.
And one more thing, forget about any surgery down there and never ever do any cutting or such yourself! That's an order okay!
PS: Please read Kristen's letter. She showed her big lips to her boyfriend and he was in heaven!