magazine on the internet took an add of their site for labiaplasty

October 6, 2008

Hi. I live in Atlanta, GA. Thank you so much for your interest in this subject and for taking the time and making the effort to put together this wonderful website. I'm no fan or porn personally, but I don't really view this sight as being pornographic. I think of it more as being inspirational and educational. I wish that your site had more visibility, and that more people knew about it, because there are still very many ignorant people out there who haven't learned a thing.

As a woman, I am alarmed by the attitudes so prevalent about the way women should look and what is considered acceptable/desirable/atrractive and what is not. I'm somewhat distressed at the thought of young women and girls who think that there's something wrong with them if their genitals don't look like those of the models featured in publications such as Playboy (not to knock Playboy but if you look at the models, many of the look amazingly similar and that gets so very boring -as if to say there's only one or two ideals and those who don't fall into that category are LESS attractive and don't measure up). As a teenage girl, I had lovely 34B breasts. I always fretted that mine were too small. In tight clothing they looked nothing like Pamela Anderson's and they looked virtually nonexistent in looser, more conservative clothing. Whenever someone saw them bare, however, I was often told how beautiful they were. I worked as an exotic dancer for a couple of years and then finally succumbed to the rage of getting breast implants. I went from a 34B-C to a 34DD (I thought I was gonna get a D cup but it seems they are always slightly bigger than intended). And while I have been told by many people how gorgeous and NATURAL they look and I've had many a woman compliment them and ask who did them, I am sorry I had it done in some ways and I wish to return to my original size. I have thought about having them removed, but I will have to investigate that further as I don't want to be flat-chested.

My point is that I think that surgeries such as labiaplasty are virtually unnecessary and pretty risky -not to mention a bit insane. I don't see any point for this surgery -there is rarely if any justification for it (in my opinion at least). I just think that there are so many plastic surgeons out there who are looking for new ways to make money. It's like any other business. One can only do so many boob jobs and botox and lipo, but they still have to make their profits. Labiaplasty is a new frontier for them, and I think things are getting too crazy. I have a very small, delicate looking labia majora -almost invisible when I stand up with my legs together. When I open my legs however, it is apparent that my inner labia (while not very long) does protrude by about 1/2 an inch (not more). So, mine labia is not overly large or unattractive to me, and in fact, I've had several men tell me that it's beautiful and appealing. On the other hand, I have experienced as a dancer just how cruel some people can be -especially other women. There are also men out there who are ignorant about women's genitals and the only knowledge they have of the subject is through their like-minded friends, Howard Stern, or publications such as Playboy, and they are turned off by the thought of protruding inner labia.

Yes, people can be quite cruel. I am an adult (obviously), and I'm married to a wonderful man, so while it may be difficult, I can let some of this stuff go. I am worried, however, that women and girls younger than me will think that something is wrong with them if their labias don't look at certain way, and that it may get so bad that it will adversely effect their self esteem and there sex lives, and they may ultimately end up getting this crazy labiaplasty. Labiaplasty and other types of similar genital surgery which are not absolutely necessary for health reasons are NOT for me. How can I teach women/girls to love themselves how they are -seriously? Any ideas?

I did email the editor (twice actually) of a popular Atlanta Publication called "Jezebel Magazine" concerning an ad for a plastic surgery office here in Atlanta which offers procedures such as labiaplasty. Jezebel is an high-end publication, and I guess that these two doctors are gifted at their craft. I was so alarmed by what it said about protruding inner labia -that it's associated with giving birth and aging -NONE of which apply to me! I'm also alarmed at the women who think they can have their hymens sewn back and become revirginized! How sexist is that? Why is it so important for women to being less well-versed when it comes to sex while men could have had multiple partners in their lives and not be looked down on? I actually worked with a dancer who thought she could do that -even after already giving birth to one child! Anyway, the editor of this magazine never once responded to me or acknowledged my email. I did, however, notice a few months later that they ad was GONE! I've got no idea why, but I wish it had something to do with my email to her. Maybe it's gone because of other people's complaints or the physicians didn't want to renew it -who knows.

Anyway, what can I do to help women learn to love themselves and teach men to love a variety of shapes, sizes, and looks -seriously? I feel very passionate about this and want to help people but don't know how without sounding as if I am ranting and raving. Any ideas? Also, thanks for taking them time to find such beautiful models with protruding labia. Women and men should see these and see that there's more than one kind of beauty. Also, I don't recommend this site for minors, but when they start to mature and become aware of their developing bodies and sexuality, they are probably going to exposed to nudity and sex at some time in their lives and I think that it is important for them to instill awareness and self-esteem in them from an early age -the question is how do we do it? If I had a daughter I wouldn't want hurt to be hurt or ashamed EVER. If I had a son I wouldn't want him to disrespect any females.

Replies

Bulgarian Girl

October 7, 2008

Hi there,
you're totally right about what you say.Plastic surgeons obviously take advantage of people's concerns in order to earn some extra cash.People,especially women, feel so uncomfortable with their bodies.Everybody wants to be perfect,and apparently, perfect means unnatural.What people seem to neglect is that mother nature has created diverse forms and shapes,and plastic surgeons know that well...I'm not saying that I'm totally against plastic surgery,i just think that in most cases it's useless.
Labiaplasty is a great example of how useless it can be.In my opinion,ignorance is the cause of the whole issue.Magazines like Playboy,most erotic sites on the net and even textbooks and encyclopedias(with descriptions of the female anatomy) show small inner labia,even the name "minora" suggests that the inner ones ARE smaller.When we studied about the female anatomy at school,in the textbook it was clearly written that the outter labia cover the inner ones.So how would a girl with large lips feel when she read this ? They tell you what's "normal" and obviously you don't fit in that category.Men can't know about large labia until they saw it with their own eyes,and I guess that's a good explanation of why some of them react in a negative way about it.
They could mention in the textbooks that the size and shape of the vulva vary and that that's completely normal-we're not surprised when everyday we see people with different eyes,hair color and height,then why should we be surprised at large labia ?
Also,I think that some people are not aware that the labia minora don't come out of the vagina...they surround its entrance but don't come out of it...if they knew that ,they probably wouldn't think that a woman with large labia is all loose and that she has slept with too many men.
So I think it's all about being more educated.If girls knew they were normal,that would be a great comfort for all of them.I'm really glad there's a site like this that's so reassuring.It's also great to know that men are also into it ;) There's a good chance for a woman to find a partner who will truly appreciate her so I think all the ignorance and nasty things people do or say can be swallen.
Thanks a lot to Labi Amore for the great job !The site is absolutely great.
PS : Sorry if there are any mistakes in my letter but I'm from a non- English speaking country.I'm still at school and I'm still learning ;).

ScandinavianGirl

October 9, 2008

Seriously, Bulgarian Girl, you are so, so right! At no point in the sex education I had or in my biology classes, where we were tought about male/female genitals , there was said anything about how the inner labia differs in size from woman to woman. Very strange, because you are tought about how breats and penises come in different sizes. Why not the labia?
And I really loved what you said about how the labia doesnt come out of the vagina. It's so stupid to assume a girl with bigger labia is "used" pussy or something like that.

- And a different note; in my language labia minora is called shame lips. Isnt that just incredible silly?

Happy27

October 12, 2008

Hey Scandinavian girl :-)

I'm from Scandinavia as well... And I've also been thinking about the fact that in "our" language it's called "shame lips" Like we are supposed to be ashamed of them... I think that is just soooo wrong. It shouldn't be words like this on genitals at all.
I hope that the education will get better everywhere, cause alot of people are still so ignorant when it comes to woman being different "down there". We've been taught to except alot of differences through the years, but for some reason the issue that labias too, comes in different shapes & sizes is never mentioned.

Rob C.

October 15, 2008

I think the best way to get young girls and women to love their labia and to be proud of them is to instill self-confidence in them from an early age. As I can see, this is the biggest problem with girls who come on this site, relating their experience: it seems to me that they can't really come to be their own selves, that they feel like they have to conform to standards. That is the true character of a strong woman: she is not in anyone's face about the superiority of women (meaning, in the way feminists tend to be), but she knows that she is strong, good, right, and comfortable with herself, her body, and her opinions. And who wouldn't want anyone like that to spend their life with?

October 16, 2008

I'm the one who wrote this initial comment. Thanks to whoever responded favorably. I wanted to add that plastic surgeons WANT us to believe (women especially) that something about us isn't perfect and COULD BE better -like our breasts, labia, nose, cellulite -whatever. Plastic surgery is BIG BUSINESS. I'm sure that it must be extremely competitive out there. They are always looking for ways to make money. As I stated earlier, there are only so many boob jobs, nose job, and facelifts that they can do. It's almost like the idea of the ideal woman and the idea of natural beauty and being true to oneself are two concepts that don't mix!!! If they professed the belief in natural beauty and love and acceptance of oneself, then they wouldn't make nearly as much money! Be careful with them! They have a way of gently pointing out this and that which, in their opinions, could be improved and which is detracting from you appearance! Don't believe them! They just want your money, and once they've got it, what's done is done. I'm not knocking the whole idea of having plastic surgery -especially to correct things that NEED to be corrected. I do totally disagree, though, with the idea that there is a perfect ideal, and I disagree with with the idea of trying to totally reshape and alter one's own natural appearance in order to look more like that ideal. Be true to yourself. You won't be happy trying to be someone else. God made you perfect as you are!

ScandinavianGirl

October 17, 2008

To Happy27:
Nice to see another person from Scandinavia. :) I dont know which country you are from, but Im from Denmark - dont know if it's called shame lips in Swedish or Norwegian. I looked the the subject of labia up on the Internet - and I've seen sites suggesting the use of kønslæber instead of skamlæber/shame lips. So I think I'll stick to this word from now on.

Heather

October 29, 2008

Rob, I agree with most of what you wrote, but I have to object to your assesment of what a feminist is.

Feminists do not believe that women are superior to men--not at all. Feminism is the belief that women are EQUAL to men, and should be treated as such. Neither sex is better than or superior to the other.

As Susan B. Anthony once said, "Men, their rights, and nothing more; women, their rights, and nothing less."

The idea that women should alter their genitals to conform to a ridiculous 'beauty standard' is an example of the sexism that is still alive and well in the world, but if anyone believes that sexism is NOT still affecting women today, pick up a copy of "He's a Stud, She's a Slut, and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know" by Jessica Valenti.

"Me," above mentioned that plastic surgery is big business. Just a quick look at the math is staggering. Most (as in the vast majority) of reductions are not covered by insurance, which means the doctor can charge and collect a heafty fee. Assuming a doctor does only two reductions a week, at US$5,000 each or three reductions at US$3,333 each, that's US$10,000 a week. Multiply that by 50 weeks out of the year (with a little time off to spend their cash), and that's US$500,000 year. Half a million a year! No wonder so many surgeons have devoted their entire practices to doing labia reductions!

Happy27

November 2, 2008

To ScandinavianGirl:
Hey there Denmark!!! :-) Not too many Scandinavians here I think, so it's nice to see you here:-)
I'm from Norway... and I think it's all wrong to have a name like "shame lips" for our labias... So I'm glad they wanna use another word for it;-) Seems like this is a word that was used a long long time ago, and nobody bothered to change it.

The worse part is that in 2008 girls liks us still feel bad about having large labia. I think it should be common knowledge that pussy lips are different in shape and size, just the way penises are... I can't understand why we've never been educated in this. I always felt bad looking in the in the books with drawings of "what a pussy sholud look like" And it looked nothing like mine. No wonder we feel bad, and freaky.
I just love this site, and I keep coming back to it:-)
After I came across this site I have actually been thinking of how cool it would be to go to a nude beach. I've never wanted, cause I've been to ashamed of my large labia. Well, I don't think I would dare all alone, even though it would have been such a big step for me.... We should all go on a group tour to a nude beach with our large labias:-) Would love to see the faces on the guys there...;-)

Take care all of you beautilful ones!!!

Amanda

November 9, 2008

I live in Austria and I just realised that in German they also call pussy lips Schamlippen. Shame lips! I never noticed that before.

Add a reply